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For those of you who are Guillermo Del Toro fans please go and see this film as I am sure you will enjoy it. It carries all the trademark style of a Pans Labyrinth with weird creatures, maze-like caverns and a strong female character fighting against an evil male representing the military. You will be caught up in the romance of good overcoming evil and unlikely concepts of love.

However, if you are looking for a movie to be entertained then let me share with you why this is not for you. Warning there will be spoilers.

The story is set in the 1960’s revolves around Elisa, a mute female janitor played by Sally Hawkins, who works at a water research facility. She is shown as a lonely woman with an older male neighbour, Giles, with whom she shares an affection for older movies, TV shows and music. At work, she cleans the facility with her friend Zelda, Octavia Spencer, who does enough talking for the two of them and while Elisa is mute she does not appear to have any problems communicating with others. One day while they are cleaning one of the research rooms, which could have been transferred directly from Frankenstein’s castle, a water tank is brought in that is housing a large human-like creature. At the same time, we meet the evil security man, Strickland, who we learn is the real monster of the movie

Even though the monster rips two of Strickland’s fingers off, Elisa feels a strong bond with the creature as they are both lonely and neither can speak. Even though the creature is military secret Elisa is able to sneak into the room where it is held and decides to share an egg with it. She then sneaks in an old style portable stereo with which she plays music to the creature with no one finding out. After teaching it sign language to say egg and music the emotional connection is complete and they are BFF’s. Strickland decides that the creature is not of much value and decides to kill it and cut it up to see how it works. In true James Bond fashion, they set its termination for two days time instead of straight away.

Elisa finds out and makes a plan to help the creature escape. She recruits her gay neighbour, who is also lonely, to her mission and they arrange to break the creature out of a high-security military facility by placing it in a laundry basket and driving it out. Along the way, she is aided by a Russian spy/Professor who believes the creature should be saved even if it means Moscow misses out. Fellow janitor, Zelda, also becomes involved and they are able to rescue the creature and take it back to her small apartment where she keeps it in the bathtub. While she cares for it they become more than just friends and have sex. It might be a slimy creature from the Black Lagoon but it also has an impressive set of abs. The fact that this takes place after she fills up her bathroom with water which then leaks to the movie theatre below without anyone becoming suspicious or wanting to inspect her apartment is not explained. We also find that the creature has amazing healing powers as he cures Giles baldness but only after he bites one of his cat’s head off.

In the meantime, the evil security officer tries to find out who stole the creature. Even though the security cameras were turned away so the rescuers could not be seen all he would have had to do was watch who was in the landing dock just before the cameras were adjusted and he would have seen Elisa. His woeful attempts to intimidate the janitors or find any clues makes you wonder how effective he has been in his job previously. Meanwhile, Elisa waits for the rainy season to come so she can release the creature into a canal which when it becomes deep enough will open up into the ocean thus releasing him ‘Free Willy’ style. It is never really explained why she can’t just take him to the other side of the canal gate and drop him straight into the sea!!!

As time goes on the creature becomes sick and is losing his scales, Elisa grows more fond of him and Strickland finally gets closer to solving the puzzle by going after the wrong suspect. After some graphic violence, Strickland finally works it out that Elisa has the creature and is going to release him. In the pouring rain, as Elisa, Giles and the creature are saying their final goodbyes, Strickland arrives and shoots both Elisa and the creature and in his evil way gloats on his success. Suddenly the creature is able to heal himself of the bullet wounds, even though he couldn’t stop his scales from flaking, and gives Strickland his comeuppance but not before he recognises that good beats evil. Zelda brings the police who all stay away from the shooting scene while Zelda races to the group to watch as the creature take Elisa with him into the canal. Once they are submerged he kisses her which not only brings her back to life but also gives her gills so they can all live happily ever after.

If the storyline sounds like nonsense – well it is, but it was directed by Guillermo Del Toro so it is stylish nonsense. The fact that it has been nominated for 13 Oscars says more about the competition than the quality of this movie I believe. At first, I really disliked it but having considered it further some of the actings wasn’t too bad, the sets were good but as a fairy tale, it was no Little Mermaid.

6 friends out of 10